Silly arguments always have a trigger. There's always a comment or word that is said that sets it off. Next time you sense a silly argument approaching, just stop while you're ahead. It's better to hold your tongue than to fight over something stupid. A bunch of stupid fights will lead to bigger fights.
If you are trying to help relieve stress in your home, make sure you aren't pushing your husband's buttons. Try not to push issues that you know upset him, and hopefully it will keep peace.What can a wife do to help break a habit of pointless aguing in a marriage?
do not argue back. to be a good wife is not in a manual. you kind of go into naturally. make his homecoming special. have a cup of coffee or whatever he likes when he comes home.
i don't mean walk around on egg shells; life is always stressful at some point or another. when he wants to argue just say, ';HONEY I LOVE YOU.'; i was not there with you today and if i was it would of not been such a bad day. but now that you are home lets just let it be that ,home. when you come through that door you will leave work on the door step and maybe around 9:30 i will let you go get it and we can talk about it. good luck and i hope it works out for you.
Arguing is baby stuff, but I hasten to add, it isn't entirely your fault. We do not teach communication skills in hs, so we turn your guy out with no ability to get your issues out there without resentment and rage, and this is erosive to your marriage. In fact, we don't teach you guys how to shop for a proper spouse, how to parent, how to budget... nuttin'. And as a public school teacher, my deepest apologies. We have failed you and failed him, and failed your marriage.
But it IS now your responsibility to learn the language of communication without trouncing on each other's egos. If you are having huge arguments and screaming at each other like three years old, you are correct.... this is indeed pointless.
Suggestion: Get yourself a couples' counselor, take paper and pen with you... you will learn a lot on how to solve issues and injure no one. There is one hell of a lot of difference between, ';Goddamn it George, why the hell every Saturday, you have to work on your cars, and I am stuck babysitting the kids... ya know'; I'd like to do something else that pick up after you and them on the two days I don't work.'; and ';George, I am as frustrated as you are with what happens to our weekends every single week. When can we sit down and find a way to better plan so that you have time with your cars, and I have time to go do some things with a girlfriend?';
See the difference? In the first it is all his fault. In the second, you are claiming ownership of the problem and as well of its solution..
See a counselor, hon. Two sessions. Easily worth the $80 buckos an hour... best money you will ever spend. I promise. Trust me.
slap the man across the face many times
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